An Open Letter to the Vancouver Canucks,

Luongo is awesome! A miracle worker, even. However the one thing he can’t do is score goals. I’m talking to you EVERY SINGLE OTHER PLAYER ON THE CANUCKS. During this playoff series I’ve made 2 specific 4 hour roundtrip trips to Mechelen and watched two complete games and cheered exactly ZERO goals.

Tonight things need to get better, not just because I deserve to party for a goal, but because Luongo deserves the cup. Pull your bootstraps up, roll up your sleeves, and put pucks in the net boys. Because Turco sucks, and we gotta chance to win this. So do it.