Thanks to Jesus’ late-April resurrection and Kate and Wills’ impending nuptials, late April is a glorious logjam of bank holidays.

The significance of the propinquity of these crucial events can only mean one (or two) things: either the divine right of kings is somehow related to the chocolate bunny myth via an arisen Zombie Jesus, or it’s coincidence. But I doubt it’s a coincidence: these things just fit too well together.

Regardless of the theories, this magnetic throngy crush of visitors and vacation days means that it’s really expensive to travel at the end of April. Prohibitively so.

I think if Jesus and the Royals (good band name?) were really keen on giving something to the fair citizenry they would have somehow conspired to make it a little bit cheaper for me to go back to the west coast of Canada this April. I’d happily make room here in this crowded town for a tea towel-toting church-and-stater.

As it is, a trip to Vancouver and Victoria BC Canada (where I’m long overdue and acutely keen for a visit) has been thwarted by grossly exaggerated airline ticket prices.

I can’t help but think these benevolent leaders really missed the boat by not making my holiday planning easier and more economically feasible.

So I’ll just have to eat extra chocolate eggs and cream teas on my souvenir cup and saucer set in a vain attempt to fill this void and sate this wanderlust.